The map to a womans heart through CRAZY translation of the woman

I thought i should write this blog for all men who are struggling with women and just for a good laugh

1) If  you ask your lady if you can go out  and you get a response like this "Its ok" , " It's fine" , "Yaaaa, you can go"*(after a long pause of thinking) , then i advise you to stay put , smile, tell your wife/girlfriend you would rather spend that time with her and give her a kiss otherwise she will take a nutcracker and twist your balls off. All of the above responses technically translates in to " ya sure, you go and see what happens when you get back" or " ya you can go and i'll probably land up in tears when you gone but then we will see what happens" or even " if you take one step out that door i will have a BF(bitch fit)!" So guys just either ask her to join or sspend the night with her, its alot easier on you and your precious bag down there.

2) If you and your lover get in an argument or disagreement, the lady usually becomes stubborn and decides that ignoring her spouse will make him say sorry...all you need to do to make a quick make up is...(no ,not sex - perhaps later, but right then the dragon will come out of her if you even try it as she will turn around and say that all you think about is your love item down there), no...what you do is cup her face in your hand, squeeze her cheeks forward(not her ass chicks you perve ^_^)and go " moody...moody...moody,lookie at missie grumps" , she will immediately start smiling and if she doesnt , then tickle her till she does and if that doesnt work ..you're on your own buddy :)


3) Women are the queen of stubborn...BUT... men are worse...women cant hold their stubborness, they love their partners too much and hate conflict(well atleast most of us) men on the other hand,are the kings as they can hold their stubbornness - so if a women leaves the room and says she is going for a walk, or going out after a heated argument then DONT run after her - yes she needs her time to cool off...and it wont be long... she expects you to run after her and kiss her and hold her and forget about all you are doing and ONLY give attention to her and although that would be nice, you need your time too. Let her storm off or ride away...SHE WILL BE BACK and even if you carry on with what you are doing, she will come back give you a kiss tell you she loves you and do her own thing...on the other hand you get those women who come back and shout "WHAT THE F*** DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?! WHY DID YOU NOT RUN AFTER ME?WHAT IF I GOT HURT OR KILLED?"you simply smile and say "i did not tell you to walk out the door...it hurt my feelings"watch how quickly her heart melts






4)finally one last hint....if you are trying to work on a womans tits... do everything she hates you doing...whether it be pick your nose, mess in the kitchen, dirty the floor, cut your nails in the living room, leave things lying around,or put grease on anything in the house...BUT...everything you do comes with consequences so expect the following:

 1) the dog box for the month. 2) No sex till she is ready and she will probably start a blowjob and not end it just for pure torture.3) ignoring you for as long as possible - the silent game,4) locking herself or you in the bedroom till she has adequate punishment ...so beware women are crazy ,yet intelligent beings and will twist your balls till you scream on innocence